I beg for more privacy from OpenAI and Meta, but less from each other.

I saw this “keep everything private” advice and had to disagree with almost all of it (except 6 – never share others’ secrets).

While we’re all posting advice about protecting our “privacy,” we’re feeding our entire lives to big tech companies. We’re having deep conversations with ChatGPT instead of real people. We’re lonelier than ever.

My counter-takes:

Being private about your next big move? Nope. Learning and building in public are proven strategic approaches. Don’t work in silence – we’re lonely enough already.

Be silent about your money struggles? Pretending layoffs didn’t happen helps no one. I’ve seen people share their job search struggles on LinkedIn and get referrals, support, and ultimately land jobs.

Don’t share your insecurities? Yes, be selective – but how do you know who’ll weaponize them without opening up? True growth happens when you confront vulnerability.

Be secretive about your income? If you’re looking for co-founders, you MUST talk about runway. Let’s not pretend we don’t have rent to pay.

Be private about family issues: 90% agree – heal privately. With only exception: Abuse victims often stay silent out of shame. Speaking up (to safe people/resources) saves lives. Normalising it and creating space for it is crucial. 

I understand strategic sharing. I know what’s inappropriate. I’m recovering from toxic environments where trading secrets was the fast lane to connection. But creating connection where it matters and honoring it is so important right now.

I think we’ve overcorrected. Opening up to people makes you relatable, helps you grow, challenges you, connects you.

Yes, be intentional. But don’t mistake isolation for wisdom.

We’re all just people at the end of the day.